Member News
By Ned Simons - 4th March 2010
MPs and peers took to the stage last night to showcase their musical, comedic and theatrical talents.
Hosted at the Intercontinental Hotel by Hyde Park, the annual "Palace of Varieties" show in aid of Macmillan Cancer Support is a chance for parliamentarians to impress and make fools of themselves in equal measure while raising money for charity.
The cross-party witticisms and musical stylings of the Lembit Opik, Stephen Pound and Nigel Evans are often the headline act.
They performed their 'Laughing Politimen' routine with characteristic humour and self-awareness, with much of the skit focusing on Opik's repeated denials that he is having a relationship with 23-year-old model Katie Green.
And to the crowds delight, the sketch ended with Green joining the Tory, Labour and Liberal Democrat MPs on stage, representing (naturally) the Green party.
But the irreverent trio were upstaged by Tory MP Hugo Swire, whose turn as part-auctioneer-part stand up comedian squeezed thousands of pounds out of the assembled VIPs.
Among the lots up for grabs were a one hour dance lesson with Strictly Come Dancing star Kristina Rihanoff, a behind the scenes tour of Formula One team Brawn GP's headquarters and a private dinner with England rugby coach Martin Johnson.
And Tory MP Tony Baldry grabbed four nights at a luxury Madeira hotel for £1,200.
The highest bid was for a head and shoulders portrait with Andrew Festing, for which Swire secured a bid of £7,000 for the cancer charity.
The pig farming East Devon MP regularly acts as a charity auctioneer, and once sold one of his own rare breed piglets for charity for the record-breaking price of £10,000.
Parliament's resident rock band MP4, made up of Tory Greg Knight, Labour's Ian Cawsey and Kevin Brennan and the SNP's Pete Wishart also made an appearance.
Their performance, a rock medley of 'Mercy' by Welsh popstar Duffy and Ben E. King classic 'Stand by Me' caused Labour's Stephen Pound to dance around his front row table.
If guests were brought to their feet by MP4, they sat in fascination (or was it fear?) as Edinburgh South MP Nigel Griffiths stalked around the crowd during his rendition of Robert Burns poem Tam O'Shanter.
Other performances included songs from Ken Purchase, John Hemming and Martin Linton and Caroline Spelman sang a duet with Sarah Teather.
Baroness Knight, Lord Lang of Monkton Lord Colwyn, Lord Donoughe and Lord Wright of Richmond represented the Lords on stage.
Dods Parliamentary Communications Ltd